Five tips to get the career that you want!

Fashion will always be my first love! Frida skirt Aspiga (£125)

I often play my cards quite close to my chest on things of this nature. First and foremost I'm a Mum and that's where my efforts have, and always will, be. But there are definitely things that I want to achieve on the work front. This post is about my journey so far and the strategies I've used recently to push things in the direction that I would like them to go. 

How it all began.... 

 When I started as a Stylist 9 or so years ago now, it was very much about building the business. I was doing lots of personal styling appointments, organising events, presenting in store for brands such as M&S, as well as running fashion shows. The hours were long, physically it was exhausting and with three young children, I now look back and think that I was probably slightly crazy. But I had left the law behind and I wanted to prove that I could make a success of my new venture. 

Lenu maxi dress Aspiga (£95)

The blog was born!

Shortly after I started styling, I started the blog. It was a spur of the moment thing (as you can tell from the name!) largely because I love words and I missed writing but also because I thought that there was room for a blog run by someone over the age of 25, to post daily outfits. Many of you have been with me since the start and I am grateful to each and everyone of you who reads my posts. As the children were young, I could work in the day and blog in the evening. And it all seemed to work quite well.

The blog quickly took off - well as far as I could tell it did - because coming from a legal background I had no idea about google analytics. Monetising a blog wasn't really an option in the early days either. But Style Guile was shortlisted for an award and I got a trip to London where I met Trish Halpin, the then Editor in Chief of Marie Claire. Had I had even an ounce of nounce about me I would have capitalised on that  shortlisting big time. But I just didn't know how to so I failed. Miserably! 

Fitness - probably my second love after fashion - and my family of course

What happened next?

What happened next was that I became intimidated. New blogs popped up and I felt that they were all better than mine (probably because they were!) to the point that I couldn't read them. The Daily Mail took a pop at me and knocked my confidence. So I took the decision to forge my own path without looking around me - operating in a vacuum really. And that was probably a really silly thing to do. But in some ways it wasn't entirely surprising really - I mean we are talking about the girl who studied for, and took, her Law Society Final exams without ever opening the core materials that were given to her on day one. Scaredy pants!

Having said that, equally I had lots of balls to juggle with the styling, and the children, so it wasn't easy for me to raise my head above the parapet and engage, and nor was it easy to get down to London for the events and press days which really help when it comes to forging relationships with brands and meeting other bloggers. Equally as I was working on growing the styling business, my time for blogging was limited. 

Despite being able to get down to London only infrequently, interestingly I was once accused of being "Smug and London-centric" by someone on Mumsnet. The group that many of us know and love (!) I really would hate to think that I came across as smug but London centric? Even less likely when you live in Birmingham. I watched from afar what other bloggers had to tolerate  in terms of "abuse" and I really didn't want to have to go through that, so I just kept my head down. What I should have done was shrugged it off and laughed. 

I never really set out to make money from the blog, even when it became easier to do so. My intention was to only post, where possible, about things that I had seen in real life. I felt that it was important to be authentic and genuine, so that when I was recommending pieces, it was from a position of knowledge. So whilst I do use affiliate links, if I do earn any commission it's more a case of luck, rather than because I go hunting for pieces which will earn lots of commission for me. 

Styling the Orwell & Austin look book

So what changed?

Then in the late summer of last year I met several people, independently of one another, who just made me see things slightly differently.  It was as if the stars were starting to align. I started to re-assess what it was that I really love doing, where I wanted to get to and how to get there.

In all honesty, I'm not sure that I've totally figured it out but I think that I have a much clearer idea now and these are the strategies that I've used to help me along the way:

I started to engage more. The one thing that I should have been doing all along. I always felt that I wasn't witty enough, or worthy enough, or that anyone would want to hear what I had to say on Instagram or anywhere else for that matter. And maybe they still don't. But there are over 73 million people on Instagram so chances are that someone, somewhere, is likely to like what anyone says! You just have to start chatting. I was late to the Instagram party for sure - but, I kind of understand it (a little better) now.  

I started to accept invitations. Not a lot of invitations but ones that were intimate and appealed to me. I've always been the one to do the school run and have felt that it's "my job" to be here. But the children are older now and Mr SG seems to have a little more flexibility at work. Funny how that's coincided with them getting older (and therefore easier). I'm sure that he never appeared before 7.30pm when they were little. Hmmmm. Going to certain events enabled me to meet new people, to ask questions and to realise that the best way to learn was to talk to people who were doing the same things as me. How long did it take for that particular penny to drop then Beth? 

I reached out and asked for advice from individuals who I already knew before I crept into my hole. And guess what? They got back to me. They didn't tell me to go away, or say that I was boring or unworthy of a response. They answered my questions, gave me resources to follow up on and reminded me how nice how everyone out there really is. I mean thinking about it, who doesn't love being asked for advice? It makes us feel like we have something worthy to contribute. 

I followed up on the resources that were suggested to me I've listened to podcasts (sometimes several times over), read blogs to which I've been referred, read books and articles, looked at updating the blog and tried to arm myself with information. As they say, knowledge is power. And you know something? I've not come across anything which makes me think that what I want to achieve, isn't achievable. 

I've changed my mindset As a result of listening to inspiring women on podcasts, I've definitely changed my mindset. I've taken courage in both hands and set out exactly what it is that I would like to get out of a project. I've turned other projects down because they will take up too much of my time and stop me from focussing on what I want to focus on. I'm in the process of creating a second "office" area dedicated solely to blogging, I'm thinking about getting an assistant and you know something? I feel a whole lot better. Visualisation works. Writing down goals works. Reaching out, asking for  help, arming yourself with knowledge. It all helps to change your mindset.  

I know that lots of people thought - and probably still do think - that I was crazy to want to work at QVC. But I love it! The people are fabulous, we have some great brands coming on board and I always love seeing who's in the dressing rooms.

And this is where you lovely people come in. A few years ago I remember Laura from the blog Wearing It Today asking her readers what they would like to see more of. I was horrified - not because it wasn't a brilliant thing to do -  how can you really deliver what your readers want if you don't ask them what they want? But because it was so brave. What if they said that they didn't like what she wrote? What if they were mean? What if they said she was getting it all wrong? 

But I'm going to ask you all - what would you like to see more of on here? My plan is to have separate headings for fashion, fitness and lifestyle - all of which will have sub categories and to post on regular days, so that I manage expectations better. Instagram has taken over quite a lot from daily outfit posts but there's still plenty to write about. I do still think that there is a (miniscule) niche that I can fill in this saturated blogging market and I have a list as long as my arm of posts that I want to write. So, if you have a minute, do please let me know. And if no-one comments, so be it. I shall go about things in my own way - but this time I will engage with others first! 

Oh and there may just be the odd post about gin too. Wouldn't it be lovely one day if we could all share one together? 

What to wear when running? It's the eternal question!

One of the subjects that I'm most frequently asked about is running: what to wear, what to eat and how to get out there and do it in the first place!

Well luckily, the issue of how to get out there in the first place (and hopefully quite a few other things besides) is addressed in this post here which I wrote back in October. I've written several running posts over the years, which you can also read here and here (there may be a little overlap. Sorry!)

But as to what to wear? Well that seems to be something that causes much discussion if not a little distress. So I'm going to identify some of the things that you might want to think about and then have a chat about them. Oooh but first, I should just say that I'm not able to include images from GAP and M&S for some reason. I've tried for hours but I'm just going to have to get on and post, or else abandon the whole thing!

So here goes....

1. Layers
2. Underwear 
3. Socks 
4. Leggings
5. Tops  
6. Jackets
7. Hat and gloves

Layers

Layers are, if you like, the holy grail of getting it bang on temperature wise. Layers of fairly well fitting pieces made from sporting fabrics that are of similar thickness and which can be taken off and on again as needed, are essential. Anything heavy, such as a sweatshirt (non breathable) or with feathers in it such as a puffa (too hot) will leave you feeling uncomfortable and heading for home before you've finished your first km.

And the point of the layers being fitted as opposed to baggy is that they will fit underneath each other without getting ruched up and becoming uncomfortable.  

Even on the coldest of days, such as today when it was snowing, I'm only in 3 layers - and I'm an utter wimp. I always wear a fitted no sleeved vest as a basic. Then when it gets colder I'll add a long sleeved top and from about mid October onwards, a jacket. The only thing that changes during the winter is the weight of my jacket. I have one heavier one that I wear when it's really cold and rest of the time (if a jacket is needed at all) it's a lighter weight one.  And apart from your first layer of a vest top, in my humble opinion, all of them should have long sleeves so that they can be tied around your waist.

Underwear

Irrespective of your bust size, I would absolutely say that a sports bra or cropped sports top is necessary. They are made for comfort and offer the best support possible. They can be padded or not, underwired or not. They can have racer backs, wide straps, narrow straps - anything that you like really but I would say that the right underwear is key. We've all seen those women running in the wrong bras and I'm not sure that any of us wants to go there.

Personally I love the M&S ones but I think that I'm inherently lazy and I just can't be bothered to try other brands. Plus I guess if they work, there's no need to look anywhere else. They have great prints, colours and styles, all of which you can take a look at here. 

There are special pants that you can buy to run in but I've never ventured into those. My everyday pants have always served me just fine but if they're your thing by all means give them a try (and let me know what you think.)

Socks

This sounds dramatic but the thought of running in "normal" socks fills me with horror. I don't know why - maybe it's a security thing. I like nice, soft, well padded, sports socks. Some of the best are, for my money, in Primark. I like them cut quite low too - they're just more flattering around the ankles, especially if you're wearing capri leggings. 

Leggings

Oooh now there's a subject with legs. Capri or full length? Low rise or high rise? Fabric composition? Thermal or not and how about compression? 

I would say that I've probably tried most of them and my favourites are high rise capris. Full length thermal tights are great for when it's really cold and compression tights do feel lovely on a very long run but both of those are pricey. So on the whole, if you're just starting out and don't plan on over investing in them, capris seem to do the trick 90% of the time.

Some of my favourite capris are the high rise sculp capris from GAP (£62.95)  I have to say that I've never paid anywhere near anything like that for a pair of Gap capris. Usually I pay no more than £25 in the sale or with a 40% friends and family discount. But see the high rise and the wide waistband? That's what I really like about them.

Or for a legging, there's the high rise Winterbrush print leggings from GAP (£59.95).

There's even a 7/8th legging which is longer than a capri but shorter than a full length legging. There's so much choice, so I've linked to them all here

I've also had great leggings from Victoria's Secret as well as these Body Glove Active Wear leggings (£69.99) that were gifted to me by Cocobay this time last year. 

Oh and on a really, really cold day, full length tights with shorts over the top can stop you from getting a chilly bum on a long run. 

Tops

I've already mentioned vest tops. This is the kind of fitted vest top that I like but it all comes down to personal preference. If it's a really hot day I might wear a slightly looser vest as I won't be putting another layer over the top. Otherwise it's fitted all the way. 

H&M sports vest top (£8.99)

This top is fab. It comes in 8 colours and whilst they're not necessarily very "shouty" that's fine if you don't want to stand out too much. If you do, then there are brighter ones at H&M or Primark again is good for running vests. 

As to long sleeved tops, again I prefer them to be fitted but it's all a question of taste and what works for you. I also like them to have a thumb hole in them so that I can cover my hands on colder days. 

Seamless sports top H&M (£17.99)

This is a great top in four different colours. I love that there are bright printed pieces out there at places like Sweaty Betty and Lululemon but I think that it can be too easy to get sucked into the mindset of thinking that it all has to look super cool. If you're trying to impress in a central London yoga class then maybe - if you're running along the canals in the urban hinterland of Birmingham - not so much! 

Jackets

This is my absolute favourite lighterweight jacket. It's the Seafolly Flower Festival windbreaker jacket from Cocobay and it's now in the sale, reduced from £82 to £49.20.

The best thing about this jacket is that it's cropped, so it offers all of the warmth that I need over my arms and upper torso but there's not too much flapping around, should I need to take it off and tie it around my waist. I love the print too and the fact that I can put my keys in my pocket. 

Hat and gloves and bits and bobs

Hats can be a real love, or a real hate item. One of my friends goes a bit woozy if ever she wears a hat, however cold it is. Others get earache - in which case a hat can be essential. A head band (not Bjorn Borg style I hasten to add) can be a great idea and if you've got long hair and they can also look fab. 

One of my favourite places for those extra bits and bobs is Sports Direct. They have all manner of things from the obvious hats and gloves, to reflective strips, head torches, and armbands for your phone. I've gone through many armbands over the years and this neoprene Karrimor X-lite reflect armband, which comes in four colours, is my favourite by far. 

Karrimor armband (£8.75 instead of £19.99)

It's great because first, it doesn't come undone, secondly there's room for a key and some money in it and thirdly, unlike the plastic ones, it doesn't chaff if it's against bare skin in the summer.

Running Like a Girl (£6.99)

And I still think that this is a great place to start if you want to know the ins and outs about running. I get it out every time I'm about to run a race, returning to my favourite pages for the hints and tips. 

I hope that this post helps but if you have any questions or queries, you know where to find me! 

PATTERNITY + John Lewis

We are lucky enough to have a fabulous John Lewis in Birmingham and when I was sent the look book and press pack by the store about a new brand that was launching, I was really excited to write about it. 

The new brand, "PATTERNITY + John Lewis", is stocked within our Loved & Found section in the store, which is essentially like a boutique comprising lots of niche brands. The range can also be found online here.

PATTERNITY was founded in 2009 by Anna Murray and Grace Winteringham who had a drive to use pattern as a tool to "explore, innovate and inspire mindful living through design." The founders chose to collaborate with John Lewis because they felt that as well as being iconic, it is also super forward thinking, as represented by this collaboration which combines fashion with interiors, for the first time.  

PATTERNITY + John Lewis long line parka John Lewis (£99)

The brand is about laid back sophistication with pieces for the home, together with active wear and leisurewear which can be combined together, or with existing pieces in your wardrobe, for a really modern look. The strong monochrome pallet and geometric prints are striking without being overwhelming (unless you choose to make a real style statement with them.) 

I love the above parka. It caught my eye straight away for its print, length and volume. It's a real "throw it over" item of clothing and it doesn't really matter what's going on underneath because it's all about the parka. That's my kind of dressing. 

PATTERNITY + John Lewis Jumper Dress from John Lewis (£75)

This is a look that I'm pretty rubbish at. The off duty jumper dress over leggings and trainers. Actually, that probably means that I should try it because I always love it on others and then just feel a bit of a numpty myself. My friend did a similar look the other day and she looked really cool. I just look like I've forgotten to get dressed properly. 

PATTERNITY + John Lewis flow print roll neck top (£39)

Oooh now I really fancy this for when I'm running on a warmish day. The days of me running in cropped tops are long gone. I did it a few years ago in the Great North Run because it was baking. You have honestly never seen Mo Farah looked so shocked in his entire life as I approached him after I went over the finishing line and said "hello" to him. I wondered why he looked so horrified. And then I saw the photos. Mind you, it could also have been the ice pop sticking out the top of my cropped top that had been handed to me en route and which I'd forgotten about. 

Mo need fear no more. The coverage that this top would offer would deal with all of that, whilst offering something a little different from my usual sporting attire. 

PATTERNITY + John Lewis drawstring boxy top (£38)

Now this cool top could be worn in all sorts of amazing ways - either for an "athleisure" feel or for something smarter - such as wide legged trousers and trainers or with a pleather pleated midi skirt.

This product also supports "BCI" (Better Cotton Initiative) farmers. These farmers use water efficiently, care for the environment and promote fair and decent work. I think that we are increasingly looking to issues of sustainability and environmental impact when choosing which brands to buy from. I remember listening to Stella McCartney talking on Desert Island discs when I was on a very (long and lonely) run in the summer. What she said made complete sense but I do have difficulty with her prices. 

PATTERNITY + John Lewis signature print long length leggings (£45)

Some days I'm in the mood for a full on printed legging, other days I choose to hide behind my plain navy ones. These would definitely be for those braver days but oh boy, when those days arrive, you've just got to embrace them. 

PATTERNITY and John Lewis intarsia knit cardigan (£99)

And this is this a bold geometric pattern at its very best. I love how some people I know would buy this and just wear and wear it wear it with utter joy. The way that it is layered over culottes is just fab (and another look for me to pinch!) There's 5% cashmere in this long cardigan which adds to its softness. 

Quite a few pieces have sold out but there are new pieces which are due to be released mid-season. And if pattern on your person is not your thing, there's an option for pattern in your home instead - which can sometimes be easier. 

 These organic towels which would make a real style statement in a bathroom that needed a lift (varying in price from £8 for a pack of two flannels to £28 for a bath sheet). I love buying new towels. Even if everything else in the bathroom remains the same, they can just really pep up a bathroom up.

Or for a nod to something monochrome and printed for your soap, there's this soap dish (£12)

And I'm not sure about this fab tumbler for your toothbrushes (£12) being only for toothbrushes, I think that it would look great as a pencil holder on a desk, alongside something in rose gold. Yep, that's me sold. 

I think that there might be some bedding coming too and the pieces are such a good price that it would be a shame not to bag something that you like before it goes. I shall be heading to our store as soon as I can (ie as soon as I've done my tax return!!!) for a much closer look of all things PATTERNITY + John Lewis related.

Happy Christmas - The Seven Outfits of Christmas

 Skirt from Hush (£65), Boots Jones (now £120) sequin top & Other Stories (£49 - almost sold out) Earrings Kaaren Buchanan (£68 - gift)

I had such great plans for the blog this week but as you can tell from my absence - none of them came to fruition. However I didn't want Christmas to come and go without wishing you all a very "Happy Christmas." I also wanted to say a huge big "Thank You" for reading and for your support along the way. Style Guile will be going into its 8th year next year and I know that some of you have been with me from the start. Without you all it wouldn't be here - so thank you! Hopefully next year I will be able to make time to blog more (famous last words) so I should get to chat to you all a little more regularly. 

I love Christmas Eve - it's probably my favourite day of the year. But I'm really conscious that for many, Christmas can be a difficult time. A "first" Christmas after anything sad has happened must be upsetting, so I want to let you know that amongst the merriment tomorrow, I shall be taking a moment to reflect and to send out virtual hugs to those who need them.  

As I haven't managed to blog much - OK, at all - I thought that I would do a quick round up of outfits from the week, together with a couple of other shots. After all, Christmas is about friends and family as much as the outfits.

This week, I've managed to get out early most mornings with my running friends. Those times are so precious to us all and we love getting some fresh air, some exercise and having a chat. It really sets us up for the day. This shot was taken on top of a railway bridge near to my home, just as the sun was rising. It was such a beautiful sight and just stopping (phew) and taking a moment to think about the run that I had just had with my wonderful friends was a really special time. 

Last Sunday we went to see my Mum and her sister and that too was such fun. This is a photo of her sideboard, which she had set up for Christmas. I felt that it captured the essence of Christmas when I was young, perfectly. So many people liked this post on Instagram that I have wondered about handing my account over to my Mum. Forget the fashion - it's all about the mince pies, the cake frill and the Quality Street. Nostalgia is a powerful emotion and so many people commented and identified with this post. The cake frill in particular had lots of love!

And this was my Mum's coffee table, complete with my Aunt's slippers in shot. You can tell that the children had been at the Pringles.

I seem to have been on my feet a lot this week so it was pretty much flats all the way. Dungarees and a new blouse from one of my favourite brands, Mercy Delta (which they kindly gifted to me) was a really comfortable outfit for a full day of Christmas shopping on Monday.

Our eldest daughter is working in John Lewis at the moment and we spent hours in there, taking every single item to her till just so that we could see her briefly. We also took her for lunch and although she was working, it was a really special day for us all. She loved having us so close. Sometimes people can be horrible to shop staff at Christmas (and some can be lovely) so it broke up her day and although I always chat to shop staff, it acted as a reminder to be super nice to them.

I took our youngest to see Alice in Wonderland earlier on Tuesday and I wore this outfit from Great Plains which I wrote about in my last post. This time however I wore it with trainers from Air & Grace together with a huge scarf from Jaeger which I've had for several years now. It just gave a slightly different twist to things. And I'm still quite traditional when it comes down to what to wear to the theatre/ballet/carol service. It would be wrong to pretend that I had made a huge effort but something other than jeans feels right on those occasions.

On Wednesday I was again in jeans and trainers, which were from Air & Grace. The weather has been so mild that the issue of socks (or lack of them) really hasn't arisen. This coat from Linea at House of Fraser is also perfect for this weather and it adds sharpness to an otherwise very casual and "un-tailored" outfit. Note to self - I must wear some more skirts and dresses.

More sparkles - this time from & Other Stories. And surprise surprise, I'm in (old, Gap) jeans (hence the lack of link) and Adidas trainers -again! On Thursday I had some friends come round for brunch and it was lovely to just sit and chat - particularly as they were my running friends and most of our conversations are interspersed with "Can't talk now, I can talk at the top" or "Ooh this really hurts today" or, as in the case of this morning "I thought that somehow running on Christmas Eve would be easy." Why? Who in their right mind would actually think that, let alone voice it?! (Well apart from me.)

And on Friday I was in....yup, jeans and trainers! These jeans were from Whistles a while ago now and are generally on the tight side, so the fact that I managed to get them on and keep them on all day was a result. I don't know why I decided to do double denim but I like this shirt from Zara and I haven't worn it for a while - so it kind of seemed like a good idea at the time.

We had 9 for dinner that night so there was lots of running around to do, hence the trainers. As we're going away on Boxing Day we had to start our Christmas food celebrations early, so as not to have any left overs. So, our Christmas pudding has already been eaten and the trifle already made and eaten too. I should have photographed it - the cut glass trifle bowl is from my Mum and it's a beauty. I figured that the trifle didn't quite look the same after the first portion had been served.

And look! I'm not wearing trainers! Although I am wearing jeans (Mango from nearly a year ago) and a sparkly top (again) - this time the Great Plains Suraya top (again limited in size). This is clearly not a place to come for outfit inspiration - unless you like jeans, a sparkly top and a splash of colour in accessories.

And then here we are at today and I'm wearing the first outfit. To set the scene, the children and their friends are watching Harry Potter and the Snowman will be on soon, which I love. The tree lights are on, the table is almost set for tomorrow and shortly we're off to Pizza Express before coming home when I will read "The night before Christmas" to the "children". On Boxing Day we're heading for some sun so next time I appear on here, it may well be in a bikini. And if that's not an incentive to keep off the mince pies then I don't know what is. Well, apart from turning a blind eye and breathing in, which is what I will probably do in reality.

I hope that you all have a truly special Christmas. Do come over and follow me on Instagram if you would like to see what I am up to - you can find me here And if anyone is feeling a little blue or in need of a chat, please do just drop me a line anytime. See you on the other side!

The Secret to Running (at any age!)

I'll let you in to a secret about running.....there is no secret. No-one is better, or mentally stronger, or has a magic ingredient that you couldn't possibly hope to have. They've just trained themselves to do it. (But there are a few things that you can do to make it easier). 

I've been asked by lots of people recently to write a blog post about running, specifically whether I'm a life long runner, or whether running is a recent thing for me, plus how to go about getting fit in "middle age".  So here it is. 

Now I can't pretend that I'm a serious runner in the club sense of the word, or that I'm ever even remotely interested in my times, unless I'm racing. And compared to lots of people I haven't run that much at all - 5 half marathons and one marathon, with my second planned for Sunday.

But running is as big a part of my life as it can be, next to being a wife, Mum, sister, daughter (in no particular order), friend, running a home and working. In fact sometimes it bumps one or two others off the top of the list - particularly running the home. The dust will always be there for a rainy day.

So this is my story.....

I ran on and off sporadically for many years. Occasionally I would go before school in the morning, then I ran fairly consistently at University and at Law School, plus when I trained in London - although the taxi fumes used to make me wheeze a bit after running around Green Park at lunchtime. Then when I was 25 I moved to Birmingham and I think that work got in the way, so I pretty much stopped my sporadic running.

After I came out of the fog of having had our first two, so when I was about 32 or 33, I remember going to see an osteopath because my back was bad and I was horrified to hear that my muscles were like jelly and that my tone was poor. I was slim and I had time on my side but my muscles were rubbish. I was indignant. So indignant!

So I started doing some exercise again - mainly dancing and pilates. Then, having decided that I would never be a runner, I progressed to power walking in the early mornings with our son in a pushchair, and then at work at lunchtime. I also cycled to and from work.

I never really thought that I would get into running properly (and I know it's not for everyone). I'd always found more than half an hour - well even up to half an hour - pretty miserable. I remember reading an article about a girl who started running with her Dad to get fit and after a few weeks she realised that she really started to look forward to her running sessions. I thought that she was bonkers. Totally mad. How could anyone look forward to THAT? 

Then just before I got pregnant with our third (so when I was about 37) I started running again with a girl who lived locally. I can't even remember what prompted it now but I do remember our first run. She was good. I was not. After our first run, which was about 4/5 miles in total, I was puce and shaking. Seriously, I think that my body was in shock. Shortly afterwards I was pleased to find out that I was pregnant and that I couldn't run any more! (Arguably it's a slightly drastic approach but it bought me a good few years!) 

After number 3, I spent three or four mornings a week swimming, with Matilda sitting in her car seat on the side of the pool. And then one day I noticed that I had arm muscles.  That was quite a nice feeling. And that all coincided with meeting new people who I really liked and they ran so I joined them in it. By this stage I was probably 39 or 40. I felt self conscious in a group though - I was the weakest link and occasionally I dropped out but I got to like the chatting, the freedom and the brain space that it gave me. Oh and I discovered that I liked running in the dark. You can't see the hills in the dark or the road stretching out into the distance. See, I still had a slight aversion to it even then. 

Five years ago my usual running buddy was away over the summer and another friend said that she was training for the Birmingham half marathon. I was happy to go out and train with her but never did I imagine, for one minute, that someone like me would run it. I just didn't think that I was good enough, or fast enough....or anything "enough" really. And then having done the training I thought that I may as well run the race. So I did and it was fabulous. I loved the whole thing and still couldn't believe that someone like me could do something like THAT.

And then as I've got older, I've done more running and I love it. I love being out in the fresh air, the brain space that I get and I love chatting to my friends, I honestly think that the older you get, the more stamina you get. And if you've had babies - well nothing compares to the slog of giving birth!

So that's where I am with it now. I run probably five times a week and I can tell within a few steps whether I'm going to find it an easy run or a hard run. I often get hot and sweaty, or freezing cold and wet in the rain. I've run in snow, hail, wind and heat. And still I love it. Well sometimes I hate it but never if I'm with my friends and if I'm on my own and hate it well, I just go home. 

HOW DO YOU START RUNNING?

I remember my friend and I listening with interest when Paul Radcliffe was being interviewed on the radio. We listened with baited breath as to how she answered the questions "How do you start running?" What would she answer? What was the magic formula? How do you do this weird and wonderful thing that so many people do for hours on end? 

"you just put your trainers on and you go out of the door and start running". WHAT? Was that it? Was that all that she could offer us? In one sense she's right but I think that I may be able to offer a bit more insight. So this is what I would suggest:

Apps for beginners...

I know of two people close to me who have found apps really useful. I've witnessed my husband literally going from not being able to run for more than a minute and a half at the start of May, to doing 8km now without any problem. The great thing is that the Apps take the mystery out of running and the worry of whether you're going too slow or too fast and running for too short a distance or too long a distance. Follow them and your body will adapt so that you can make the distance. There are apps to follow for lots of distances so once you've finished the first one, you can always go on to the next one. 

For those who want to increase their distance/pace...mix it up! 

If you have been running for a while and you've reached the half an hour mark but want to break through that, I think that a slightly different approach helps.

Rather than slogging around the same route three times a week and hoping that it gets easier (often it doesn't) mix it up a little. Maybe try doing one "long" run at a slower pace than you would normally run. If you go with a friend and can maintain a chat, even a slightly panting one, that's a good sign.

The aim of this run is to increase your stamina. So maybe rather than thinking about the distance you want to cover during this run, think of the time that you want to be on your feet. Maybe aim for an extra ten or fifteen minutes. In training for this marathon, on our long runs my friend and I regularly stop - sometimes for a good fifteen minutes at Costa for a cherry bakewell, some ice cold water and a loo trip. Does it matter? Maybe, who knows? But it makes those three to four hours much more bearable and it gets the miles in the legs, which is the aim of the long run.

Alongside that do a hill session each week. This could be shorter - so perhaps about 20 minutes or so. Either choose a route with a few hills and work your way up those, or choose one hill and run to the top, walk down and run up again. The aim of this run is to increase your fitness. You will get out of breath and it might not be comfortable - but it will definitely help. 

And then if you can work in a speed session, this will help too. My husband is currently following an app to increase his speed. Essentially you run at your normal pace for a few minutes and then do a couple of minutes at an increased pace - not a sprint pace as you need to do it five or six times and not collapse in a heap after the first round. But just a bit faster, to the point that you probably couldn't hold a conversation with a friend. 

Once you have worked on your stamina, your fitness and your pace, you will find that you can run for longer. It's a bit like making a cake really - lots of different ingredients need to come together for it to be a good one!

Join a running Club

I've never really felt that running clubs are for me. It's more the rigidity of the timing of the sessions that puts me off - it's another thing to factor into a timetable that's already busy but I know many who love their running clubs and for sure, they will get you on the straight and narrow. But personally I prefer to be a bit wiggly! 

Books

There are some fab books out there to read. One of my favourites is "Running Like a Girl" by Alexandra Heminsley. I would encourage any female runners out there to read this. Before any race I dip back into it and take a look at my favourite paragraphs. This is one of them:

"What I didn't know on those very early first runs - the ones where even my face seemed to hurt when I got home - was that I wasn't lily-livered or week-willed. Nor was I biomechanically unable to run. I was in fact "going lactic". I had no idea that for at regular pace it takes about ten minutes for the body to start taking on oxygen as fast as it needs it, for one's breathing to regular or for one's body to be properly warmed up. In fact I had not idea what pace I should be going at all.  My goal was simply not to die before the end. For weeks I suspected I was only able to run for ten minutes.......I want to weep when I think of the number of women who head round the block, only to return twelve minutes later, broken and tearful.....if only someone had told me sooner." 

And it's so true. Mile 2 of a run can honestly feel as bad as mile 20. Or put another way, you don't necessarily feel any worse at mile 20, than you do at mile 2.

Running Like a Girl (£5.94) Amazon

 One of my other favourite books "Don't stop me now" is by Vassos Alexander. Entitled "26.2 tales of a runner's obsession", he charts his running escapades and intersperses it with accounts of how others first started running, from Paula Radcliffe to Steve Cram the Brownlees and Nell McAndrew. If like me you people really interest you, this is a great read and easy to pick up and put down.

Don't stop me now (£6.96)

Take the pressure off..

But most of all remember, this is meant to be fun! Few of us are going to win any serious medals so see it as an opportunity to do something for yourself, to get out, to see your friends and to enjoy being outside and watching the seasons change. Life is made up of so many things that we have to do and this isn't one of them. So if it's not for you, don't do it. There are plenty of other things out there to do instead.

I should just add that of course this is only my view and everyone will have a different view and a different approach. Plus I haven't covered stretching, foam rolling and all the other bits and bobs - they may be for another post. As to running in middle age - well so long as you've not already caused yourself a nasty injury through something else, there's no reason why you can't be as good as the next person. Running is one of those things that we can actually get better with as we age. And as awful as the idea sounds, entering a race really gives you the feeling of what it's all about - the training, the preparation, the crowd, the feeling afterwards - it's nerve wracking but exciting.

Oh and if any of you ever fancy a run, you know where to find me. I'm always up for a run (and a cherry bakewell en route.)

September, I'm coming for you!

September can be a funny month. The start of a new term, children moving onwards and upwards, a chill in the air meaning that autumn is on its way and most of all, change. I've concluded that humans don't like change very much.

Don't make me go home!

During our last few days in Guernsey I was sort of dreading the return home, to life and a daily routine. And then I re-visited the "roundabout" as per my earlier post and I decided that either September could rule me, or I could get my schizzle together and tackle it head on. So before I left Guernsey I started to get my act together and I sent just one or two emails of things that I knew needed doing around the house, just to get the ball rolling. Little steps and all that.

So in no particular order these are things that I'm going to tackle and this is what I have in mind to do - a list of New (school) Year Resolutions - if you like.

Stuff around the house:

I've contacted a local handy man. The tap in our downstairs loo needs fixing, plus I have pictures to go up. I'd like to re-grout the bathroom floor and buy a new blind for the bathroom too. Even knowing that those things are in hand have made me feel better.

The girls have both tidied their bedrooms and the car is full of stuff for the charity shops. I've been through my wardrobe and sorted my clothes out, meaning that I now have a better idea of what I have and what I'd like to add. That too is a weight lifted.

There's a chair I'd like re-covering, and I'd like to replace the blind in the spare room as well as get a new sheepskin rug for it - so those things are now in hand. 

I've booked the decorator to come at the end of October to paint one of the bedrooms and also the bathroom. We've been in this house for nearly 13 years now and neither room has been decorated since we arrived. How bad is that?!

So that's it for the house for now, other than needing a new desk chair. It's GCSE year for our son and he will be sitting at his desk a lot. Oh yes, he will! 

Stuff to do for me:

Get a hair cut. I purposefully haven't had my hair cut for ages but now is the time to go for the chop. That will make me feel a whole lot better. 

Think about having a spot of botox. I've never really seriously contemplated it before now but I might just investigate it. It may not go any further than that but there's no harm in looking. 

Get back to eating 3 proper meals a day rather than summer type food. I love home made soups and stews and with the marathon coming up, I need to keep on top of my nutrition game even more. 

Plan my winter wardrobe - but that's worthy of a blog post in its own right!

Back from holiday and contemplating the jobs (and washing!) to be done

Stuff to do for work:

Say "yes" to more things that I'm invited to do. Historically I've felt that every minute of my working day should be accounted for - it stems from having time sheets as a lawyer. But I need to get out and have more fun at events, socials, networking and just in general.

Manage my work streams better. Being freelance I have lots of different "arms" to my work from personal styling, to fashion and commercial styling, TV work, blogging, working with brands and running style events. I'm never quite sure that I'm top of all of them at all times.  Any tips would be gratefully received! 

Get on top of my social media. My profile pics need updating, my Pinterest link doesn't work on my blog and there are a million and other one little things that need attending to. 

Get back in the shops pronto so I that I can fully suss out the new season's collections in preparation for all the personal shopping I have coming up. 

Sort out all my paperwork and maybe do my tax return before the end of October, rather than waiting until the end of January. 

First day back at work - judging the Midlands Media Awards. Excuse the knackered plant pots. I'm going to go and move them RIGHT NOW! 

Stuff to do for the children:

With Flo heading off to University, there are a lot of things that I need to do with her. We need to shop for bits and bobs, get her meningitis C vaccination organised and I need to help her with her bank accounts and finances. 

So that's my list of tasks for the month ahead. Does anyone else have anything that they want to add? Is there anything that you routinely do in September? (Please don't mention Christmas!!!) and which makes you feel a whole lot better. Oh but of course I forgot the most important thing. September traditionally means new school shoes....so a new pair of shoes must feature in there somewhere! 

The Magic Roundabout - a metaphor for solving a problem

When my friend came up with a brilliant way of thinking through a problem, I asked her if she would put her thoughts in writing so that I could share them with you all. It's a fantastic way of approaching whatever life throws at us. The ability to visualise what she's talking about really helps to. So, over to Libby....

"I have a particular friend who I absolutely love to bits.   We share life together, raise children together and pound for miles along streets, canal towpaths and even motorway verges training for some bonkers race or running event which will knacker our knees and mean our Achilles will never be the same again. 

I love her for lots of reasons.   One of the best things about her is where she "comes off the roundabout!"  Back up I hear you cry; loving your friends and sharing life with them, all good, but what’s all this talk of roundabouts? Let me explain. 

I get stuck with a problem.  These problems can be small or large; dealing with teenagers, navigating a mid life crisis (that’s mine and not my husband’s – why should we miss out?), dealing with loss and bereavement or processing a health scare.  I will mention this to my friend, she will muse on the problem and then often come out with a totally different view point and perspective on my situation.  It’s like we’ve come to the same roundabout, I have taken the first turning on the left but she has stayed on the roundabout and come off at the third exit.  Same problem, same roundabout, different exit, different perspectives, new solution!  It is so very liberating! 

Now when I have a problem I like to go back to my roundabout and think myself off at a different exit and a different solution.  The analogies are many and varied; staying on the roundabout until you find an exit you can handle, going down an exit you’d rather not go down but, because of circumstances, you have to go there and learn to enjoy the view anyway, they are endless.  The message remains the same; if the solution you find for a problem doesn’t sit right, it’s rarely irreversible.  Go back to the magic roundabout and find a new exit."   

From maxi skirt to mid dress....

This is the ASOS maxi skirt (£35) which I blogged about a few posts back and which I decided to wear as a dress. It's been pretty handy since we've been out here on holiday. I've also worn the black one - in fact I'm wearing it as I sit and type this - which I'm doing just before my 250th game of UNO for the day.

Luckily the sun is shining, the stash of inflatables is being added to at a vast rate of knots (we now have a unicorn, a flamingo, a doughnut, an inflatable bed and a pink rubber ring) and everyone is happy because we have Wifi and Netflix - which means I can't get people off the running machine as they've discovered the art of watching TV whilst running.  We have been sampling the local culture too - particularly the delicious Greek food and local towns but if I'm honest, I'm happiest with my gorgeous hubby and kiddies playing in the pool.

I hope that everyone is having a good week at home. I realise how annoyingly irritating it can be to read about other people's holidays, so for that I apologise. But I have to admit to being relieved that for once, we're not suffering Wales in the rain (which I've done many times with three squabbling young children over the years) so I hope that you will forgive me.